People say it’s impossible to understand women; how they think and what they want (except maybe for Mel Gibson), but I beg to differ. Some guys are experts in sending mixed signals and expect women to be expert interpreters.
A few months before I met Zaid, I was talking to an Indian guy I met on a matchmaking website. He seemed very interested and saved no effort to show it. We talked for a few weeks and seemed to hit it off. But regardless of how interested he was, there was a side of him I couldn’t read. He would disappear for days without texting or calling, and then text me saying “I’m sorry, I was busy at work”, or “I’m sorry, I had a cricket injury”, or whatever. It turned into a game of hide-and-seek, with me waiting for him to say Peekaboo. Every time I would tell myself “that’s it, I’m done”, he would come back stronger than before.
One time he went AWOL for two weeks. That did it for me. I broke it off via WhatsApp. Suddenly he calls back, apologizing profusely, and begging me to take him back, saying he was struggling in trying to convince his mother of me. He says his mother is a very traditional woman, and wouldn’t easily accept a non-Indian girl as her daughter-in-law. That was the first time I heard of a brown supremacist.
Being someone who always assumes good in people, I decided to give him the benefit of my growing doubt (talk about self-respect!). But instead of reassuring me, he disappeared again. A week later I came to my senses and put an end to this joke. I later found out that while he was supposedly busy with work and his mom, he was actually shopping around on the matchmaking website.
To be honest, up to this day I don’t know what lesson I took from this experience. But what I’m certain of is that when Allah closes a door it’s because he wants to put you in front of another one. It’s up to you to walk through it.
Regardless of everything the see-saw guy had done, I do believe in my heart he was a good man. But I deserved better than good. I wanted better, and I found the BEST.